#19 - The Inexplicable Logic of My Life by Benjamin Alire Sáenz

  Just The Basics

    Published: March 7, 2017

    Genre: Coming of age, realistic fiction.

    Pages: 464 pages

    Acknowledgements:  NSK Neustadt Prize for Children's Literature Nominee (2015)

        "And there we were, laughing again. What was it with this laughing thing? We were not supposed to be in the laughing mood. But there it all was. Me and Sam laughing. Whistling in the dark? Whistling in the dark." 

    "The Inexplicable Logic of My Life" is a coming-of-age and realistic young adult fiction novel. The book has a small and intimate cast of characters, all surrounding the nexus of Salvador and his father's home (Vicente). Salvador's adoptive father is an openly gay man; however, Vicente has spent years as the sole parent to Salvador after his birth mom died, and his birth father was never in his life to begin with. Salvador's lifelong best friend, Sam, becomes a sister to him through a major tragedy—in a story about chosen family, real family, and the inevitability of grief. In this novel, friends become family, real family is strained as Salvador's grandmother Mima battles cancer, and the role of nature versus nurture is explored in a simple yet emotional novel told in a series of extra-small mini-chapters. 

    Why "The Inexplicable Logic of My Life"?

    I saw Benjamin Alire Sáenz's name all over the teen section of my library. His Aristotle and Dante series seems to still be very popular, even with the last book being released in 2021. I personally didn't want to start another series for these final few books on my YA list, so I settled on "The Inexplicable Logic of My Life" as it stands alone, yet shares a front cover motif very similar to the Aristotle and Dante series. I went into this novel completely blind, not even reading a synopsis. What I found when I read this book was a story about grief, told in chapters that felt more like vignettes. The snapshots the readers get to Salvador's life, his relationships, and his recently budding anger issues, this novel was a fast read. A clipped-together collage of a young boy's life as he witnesses how those around him feel pain, all while experiencing his own pain. 

    Teaching Considerations

     This novel would be great for resistant readers. Especially those of Mexican heritage, as Salvador's family is unabashedly Mexican, the culture and language make up the background and context for him and his father's family. I think this would be a great book club option, as the book is relatable, understandable, and direct in its subtext. A small group of students (any secondary age, honestly, this book can be comprehended by any grader above 7th) could discuss this book easily, as well as maybe find a character that they can relate to. The biggest trigger warning for this book is the use of the F-slur for gay people. This word, however shocking to hear, fused full force in this novel, is something that at first triggers violent anger in Salvador; however is also a point of reflection for him as he begins to understand why he has recently felt so angry. This book would be a great choice for early high schoolers, who might be struggling with emotional regulation themselves. 

      Sections to Read Aloud & Reasoning

1. Me. Sam. Saturday Night. 

• "We both shrugged and kept drinking. The thing is, I didn't want to stop. I wanted to know what it felt like to be drunk. You want me to explain this logic? Well, where was the logic in loving? Where was the logic in dying in accidents? Where was the logic in cancer? Where was the logic in living? I was starting to believe that the human heart had an inexplicable logic." (ebook page 104)  

        One of the scenes where the reason for the title is made super clear is when Sam and Salvador get drunk off his dad's wine. In a vulnerable moment, they talk about both the tragedies of their life, and Salvador first comments on the illogical nature of traumatic events. This section and the surrounding chapter would make a great close-reading section for students. Questions about what "logic" is in life (if at all) may be explored in discussion or writing. 

        2. Night. 

• ''And I was trying to be strong for him, I'd never thought about that. I knew now, and maybe a part of me had always known it, that my dad knew how to keep his pain to himself. He'd learned-- maybe because he was born gay-- he'd learned how to suffer things in silence. I didn't want that silence for him. The night seemed so dark. But I think  I'd learned how to whistle in the dark. Maybe that was something." (ebook page 177)

    Salvador's dad, Vicente, is this novel's main pillar of consistent support. Almost every character has moments when they depend on him, most often Salvador. The above passage, which is the majority of the small "Night" chapter, focuses on Salvador's realization that his dad needs support, too. As Salvador grows up over the course of the novel, he begins to encourage his dad to live his life for himself beyond living it for his son. Sections like this may encourage discussion about the sacrifices of parenthood and the importance of living for oneself. 

    Overall Thoughts

        While this Sáenz novel wasn't earth-shattering or revolutionary, it was cute, emotional, simple, and quick. In this case, simplicity isn't a bad thing, as novels for younger readers need things spelled out to them. The simplicity of "The Inexplicable Logic of My Life" comes from this novel's understanding of the size of the story of grief and coming-of-age it is telling, without needing to expand the story to try to encompass an entire world. This novel just covers Salvador's life, and that's enough for this personal story. This novel focuses on the hard parts of life when it needs to, to the happy parts when they arrive, and is overall a quick and loving meditation on how the people in our life act as family to us-- whether biological family or not. 

    Future Explorations

     I think I'll give the Aristotle and Dante books a shot after sampling  Benjamin Alire Sáenz's writing style. This book did feel exactly like that, a sample of what an author has to offer. I would like to see an expanded version of the simplicity shown in  "The Inexplicable Logic of My Life". Sáenz writes realistic dialogue and has a laid-back way of characterization that allows the reader to understand the people in the novel in sometimes quiet and simple actions or little conversations. I think this was a cute book from an author who seems like an effortless creator of small, personal narratives for younger readers.